Friends

Well saw some friends from college this weekend that I haven't seen since the weight loss. They were all shocked and complimenting and it felt good. However, they all said I didn't need to lose anymore. Considering every single one of them couldn't have weighed more than 115, I wanted to scream when they said that.

Anyway. Ate a lot this weekend because Hot BF says that I'll remember having good times with my friends more than I'll remember the three pounds I'd gain. True. However, luckily, I also came down with a little stomach bug and I didn't gain a pound. Weeeee!

About to head to the gym for some running. Hoping to get in about 4 miles. My big 10-mile race is this weekend and I'm getting nervous!

P.S. put a little thinspo at the top to get me ready to run. I can't figure out how to add pictures to the bottom of a post. A little frustrating. If you know how, please help!

Le Sigh...

I'm having one of those days. One of those days where if I could beat myself up I totally would. What is wrong with me??? Why can't I just say "no" to food. Why is it when we get chicken I can't help but sneak in a little bit of the skin? Why do I have to have some of the rice? Why? Why can't I resist? Why is it such a drug for me to eat bad things?

For a really long time I prided myself on being one of those people who loved to try new things. Now I'm wishing I was one of those girls who's afraid of spice or exotic. Because all my friends who are afraid to try new things, are also the ones who never really put that much thought into food because it's not something they really enjoy. Therefore they've never had to diet, because they've never really had an appetite in the first place.

Bad weekend of eating. I'm back to 146 despite my really long workouts and a 7 mile run. I work my ass off at the gym. I mean I really work my ass off. All the trainers call me "the hardest working girl there." And they've all said they'd love to work with me because they know I'll put my heart into it. Yet, I'm not losing any weight? Why? Because I can't say no to food!

HELP! For the love of God, help me like salad without dressing! Help me say no to any carbs! Help me satisfied with snacking only on plain vegetables! Agggh!

Jessica Biel

A lil thinspo for me: Jessica Biel

My boyfriend is totally gaga over her. I want to make him gaga over me!

St. Paddy's Peer Pressure

Yesterday was a pretty exciting day for me on the scale. I saw 144! I've been trying to get past the 145 mark forever but it always felt so out reach. So, obviously I was elated.

Well, I'm guessing that was short-lived and haven't weighed myself today because of all the St. Paddy's Day celebrating I did last night. It started off good, we went to a really nice restaurant, which was full of temptations such as Belgian frites and mussels with homemade cheese sauce. But I didn't succumb, and I got a blueberry salad. (Totally sucked by the way).

I was feeling pretty proud of myself, until I started drinking. I have no idea how many beers I had last night, but I do know I was still drunk when I went to work at 5:50 this morning. I also vaguely remember sharing a fried fish sandwich with Hot BF on the way home. Don't even want to think about the amount of carbs and fat content of that awesome greasy piece of heaven on bread.

I didn't workout today, too damn tired from work and knowing that I have to be out again tonight. So that probably made things 10x worse. I haven't snacked, and only ate two small meals, but that's definitely not enough to make up for it.

I'm running 7 miles tomorrow, so hopefully that will help.

McCain Hullabaloo

For those of you out of the loop, there's been quite a media frenzy stirred over some comments about Meghan McCain's weight. Laura Ingraham, conservative talk-show host made some joke about Meghan being a plus-sized model and blah blah blah. Meghan responded with how in this day in age she can't believe that a woman's size is still a matter of prejudice.

So, let me say this first. I totally agree with McCain. There's no reason to make fun of her weight when your trying to make a political commentary. Seriously, is that the only material you could muster?

On another note though, McCain says she's comfortable with her size, which is 8 or 10. I'm a firm believer that you should be whatever size you are comfortable with. I'm not trying to lose weight for a social stereotype, I'm trying to lose weight because I don't feel comfortable in my body. I can't run as fast as I'd like to and can't bend as much as I want. However, if you are comfortable with your weight, be honest about it. There's no way in hell she's an 8 or 10. She has to be at least a 12 or 14.

Bottom line is this: If you think it's OK to be a bigger girl, then admit, you're a bigger girl. Don't lie about it.

Weekends = Bad Eating

So I was doing really well last week. I saw 145 on the scale for the first time since high school and was feeling great.

Well that was until Hot BF and I took a little road trip for a tournament he was competing in this weekend. Road trips are bad news bears for me. For some reason, I think "time in car" automatically means "comfort food."

Yup, ate some pizza, then the next day a little IHOP, and then snacked on trail mix all day while he competed. Appetite was in full gear.

Then to top it all off, I had an 8K on Sunday, so I felt like that was an excuse to pile on some carbs and we went and got some pasta and beer... Didn't stop there. After the race (although, I can proudly say I got my best time ever!) I got a crabcake sandwich, fries and more beer....

Oy.

Today I weighed in at 146.6 Sigh.

A Little Help

I broke down and went to GNC yesterday and picked up a little help. Hot BF really knows his supplements and helped me pick out a diet pill that actually works. Don't worry, I'm not taking anything that requires me to take off work (not that that would matter) and wear dark pants for the first week.

No, just a little something to give me some energy and help me burn fat a little quicker. I'm not using this as a substitute for dieting and exercising though. As soon as I finish waking up, I plan on heading to the gym to run 3 or 4 miles to get my day started. Then I'll probably come home and look at my stomach in the mirror for 15 minutes.

For breakfast I had half a English muffin with fake butter spray, an egg and 3 or 4 plantain slices. Sound like a lot? Well I like to follow the motto: For breakfast, eat like a king; for lunch, a prince; for dinner, a pauper.

I plan on spending the day studying at the library today, so hopefully that will help me concentrate on something else other than my hunger. God, I hope my appetite shrinks soon, it's the toughest part of beginning a diet.

Second Week of Diet

Well I'm on day two of the second week of second round of dieting. You see,I fell off the wagon for awhile thinking I had reached my goal weight. However, a recent trip to the Caribbean and my lack of confidence in wearing a swimsuit made me realize, I'm not quite there yet.

So current stats:
Starting weight: 185
Current weight:147
Goal weight: 125ish

It was a little hard today since we went to one of my favorite Peruvian chicken places. But I managed to pick off all the skin, ate all my salad (using the salsa as a dressing) and only a couple of tastes of the refried beans. Also, instead of eating chips and salsa, I just dipped my fork in the salsa. Not bad.

But now I'm starving and drinking green tea praying that it will help subdue my hunger...

Workout: Did an hour of strength training which included step-ups with 15lbs weights, ring rows, side planks, rack pushups and goblet squats with 45lbs.