Ooops

Well, everything WAS going great yesterday until HOT BF wanted a hamburger and we ended up at Johnny Rockets... Yeah, got a cheeseburger and a milkshake. I know some of you are throwing up just thinking about that. I came home and immediately took a couple of laxatives (my gag reflex doesn't allow purging, it sucks). I know, it's gross, but whatever, it gets the job done. I have it in my mind that it allows me to get rid of food faster so it doesn't stay in my body as long sucking up all the fat. I hope that's true, but I'm too lazy to look it up.

So far this morning I ate a peach and now I'm off to run a couple of miles before the heat flares up.

On a fun side note, tomorrow is my last graduate school class EVA. I'll have my master's degree in a few short weeks and I'm hoping it will help me get a job and get out of this apartment so I don't stare at food all day.

Birthday Week = Vacation from Diet

OK. So I fell off the wagon last week, but I actually feel renewed. Let me explain.

So after yet another week of being 141 with no change, I kind lost my cool. Got upset during a workout with Hot BF and just quit. Told him I needed a break. I needed a break from the gym. Needed a break from the diet.

Last week I ate at my favorite Indian restaurant, and then went and got a milkshake afterward. I enjoyed two plates of pasta on another night. Got totally plowed at my birthday party and ate a chili dog and cheese fries afterward. I had Chipotle...

And yes, I am back up to 143 as of this morning. However, I feel like I got my fill of bad food and now I can refocus again. I ran 5 miles like it was 1 today and it felt awesome. For the next two weeks I'm changing up my gym schedule as well. I usually work out 5-6 days a week. Three cardio and two or three on strength training and toning. The next two weeks it'll be 5-6 days a week too, however, for two or three of those days it will be twice a day. On my twice a day days I'll run a shorter distance in the morning (i.e. 2 or 3 miles) and strength train later in the day. I read an article that it boosts your metabolism like crazy and the "weight melts off."

I'll keep you updated!!!

And just to keep us all going... a little thinspo with Evageline Lilly (Kate from LOST). She has the ultimate body.

I was right...

145 again. Oy.

I type this as I'm drinking a cafe latte... Oy.

Worked my ass off yesterday and will run another 4 miles today. ( Maybe more if it stops raining). But the BF is making steak for dinner and I hate saying "no" when he puts so much work into something.

When I first started the dieting and exercising it was so damn easy to lose weight. It was like as soon as I stopped eating pizza and just replaced it, I lost like 30 lbs. Now despite the fact that my diet has been completely changed and that I'm working out 6 days a week, I'm still on a plateau.

I hate that once you become "average" that the body makes you work 1,000 times more to become "thin."

I want this so bad, so why is it so hard to say "no?"

Friends

Well saw some friends from college this weekend that I haven't seen since the weight loss. They were all shocked and complimenting and it felt good. However, they all said I didn't need to lose anymore. Considering every single one of them couldn't have weighed more than 115, I wanted to scream when they said that.

Anyway. Ate a lot this weekend because Hot BF says that I'll remember having good times with my friends more than I'll remember the three pounds I'd gain. True. However, luckily, I also came down with a little stomach bug and I didn't gain a pound. Weeeee!

About to head to the gym for some running. Hoping to get in about 4 miles. My big 10-mile race is this weekend and I'm getting nervous!

P.S. put a little thinspo at the top to get me ready to run. I can't figure out how to add pictures to the bottom of a post. A little frustrating. If you know how, please help!

Le Sigh...

I'm having one of those days. One of those days where if I could beat myself up I totally would. What is wrong with me??? Why can't I just say "no" to food. Why is it when we get chicken I can't help but sneak in a little bit of the skin? Why do I have to have some of the rice? Why? Why can't I resist? Why is it such a drug for me to eat bad things?

For a really long time I prided myself on being one of those people who loved to try new things. Now I'm wishing I was one of those girls who's afraid of spice or exotic. Because all my friends who are afraid to try new things, are also the ones who never really put that much thought into food because it's not something they really enjoy. Therefore they've never had to diet, because they've never really had an appetite in the first place.

Bad weekend of eating. I'm back to 146 despite my really long workouts and a 7 mile run. I work my ass off at the gym. I mean I really work my ass off. All the trainers call me "the hardest working girl there." And they've all said they'd love to work with me because they know I'll put my heart into it. Yet, I'm not losing any weight? Why? Because I can't say no to food!

HELP! For the love of God, help me like salad without dressing! Help me say no to any carbs! Help me satisfied with snacking only on plain vegetables! Agggh!